A Beautiful Mosaic

I got an email from our instructor at noon on Monday, the day of our first adult b’nai mitzvah class. I didn’t read his message; I was much more interested in looking at the email addresses. Who are my fellow travelers on this two-year journey? I wondered. Four of the women I know from our bi-weekly Torah study group (we decided to merge into this larger class of 20. ) I assumed that most of the others would be septuagenarian upper west side grandmas for whom becoming a bat mitzvah was now a bucket list item. And one or two token men.

But the group proved way more diverse than I could have imagined.

 

There was Mel,* the transgendered boy with the pink mohawk who had a bat mitzvah ceremony at age 13 when he was Melanie. Now he wants to become a bar mitzvah in keeping with his true identity.

And Ethel, an 85 year-old “triple repeater,” (this is her third adult bat mitzvah course)  because “you’re never too old stop learning.”

And David, the son of Holocaust survivors, who rejected Judaism and lived among the Shoshone Indians in Wyoming. He reconnected with his roots after becoming fascinated by how and why the Jews survived and the Shoshone did not.  

And Raphael, an Argentinian Jew whose grandfather was strict Orthodox, but whose father was agnostic and secular. He wants to “access” the Judaism he knows lives in his cells.

And Colleen, the red-headed former Irish Catholic who “came out” as Jew a few years ago and now goes by the Hebrew name Kelilah.

And Zack, a thirtysomething from California who became a bar mitzvah when he was 13, but didn’t feel he really learned anything and now wants a do-over.

And Leah who grew up in an Orthodox community and is now studying to be a rabbi.

Wow.  Atheists and agnostics; converts and children of survivors; a future rabbis and a former Catholic. Each of us refusing to be steamrolled by our noisy fears that tell us, “I’m too busy,” or “I shouldn’t spend the money,” or “I’m too old” or “I don’t know enough to be in this course.”  Instead,  we let our hearts lead the way resulting in a beautiful Jewish mosaic.

+Names have been changed to protect the privacy of my classmates.

Too Jewish?

“Do you really have to be so Jewish?”

Although he said it with a wink and a hug, my husband had a point. It was after 10pm on a Monday night - my birthday, no less - and I had just come home from the first of my two-year, 3-hour adult bat mitzvah classes. The previous weekend, I’d spent the better part of a sunny Sunday at a mini Hebrew marathon; on Tuesday evenings, I attend a Shabbat discussion group led by our Rabbi and every other Wednesday I meet with four women and a different Rabbi for a Torah study group. I try to light candles on (most) Friday nights; I’ve been organizing our upcoming Hanukkah festivities and I'm making plans to visit a synagogue and Jewish museum during our upcoming visit to Cape Town. And I can't wait to go back to Israel!

When we were dating, my not being Jewish was almost a deal breaker for us.  Now, twenty years later, I'm too Jewish. Oh the irony...

48

“There will come a time when you believe everything is finished; 

that will be the beginning.” - Louis L'Amour 

Today is my 48th birthday. I won’t be celebrating at a trendy restaurant this evening (okay, I did that on Saturday night. Lafayette. Fabulous.)  Nor will I be sitting at home compulsively refreshing my Facebook page looking for birthday “notifications.” Not that there’s anything wrong with that.  Instead, I will be marking this non-milestone birthday at the inaugural meeting of “Never Too Late: Bar and Bat Mitzvah for Grown-Ups,” an intensive two-year course for Jewish adults who, for various reasons, missed out on this coming-of-age event  I have a pretty good excuse; I was Catholic when I was 13.   But, as the class description says, “committing to Jewish life can be affirmed and celebrated at any point.”  So 18 years after my conversion to Judaism, I am coming of [middle] age.

I look forward to sharing my experiences here as I embark on this next leg of my spiritual journey.  Stay tuned...